Clay I used to abhor so many things Before my coming out of the dark Where I was asleep and hypnotised Secluded in a tight dark cell, recoiled Now that I think that winter and summer All seasons, things, happenings, are spells I mingle myself in dreams made by others I’m a wisp of smoke in the mist of illusions My state of abhorrence was flushed away In the stream where tears and hate clash Inside of that obscure evacuating pipeline Found somewhere outside Earth’s cosmos Now I look at abhorrent things differently With new eyes shining with curiosity And with this inexplicable understanding Of the triggering mechanism of existence But though I know is that I know nothing With humble heart I assert through this poem That what I perceive behind these brown eyes Is the coming to light of dreams that unfold I used to abhor so many things in this life But now it seems that these don’t mean a thing For even my feelings were all made up specks Flowing and ebbing from a mind full of shapes. -Eiravel-
The one-word prompt taken from the dictionary to inspire myself for this poem was the word ‘abhor’, which means to hate a kind of behaviour or way of thinking, especially because you think it is morally wrong. But I didn’t want to write a poem with negative connotation, I wanted my flow of words to give way to the type of enlightenment that I want to achieve, or that I grasp, but can’t seem to be able to put in practice.
It’s the last line of the poem that inspired the title — for that mind keeps shaping me as if I’m clay, like all of these things deemed as abhorrent. Yet, ‘That what I perceive behind these brown eyes/Is the coming to light of dreams that unfold’, thus what I came to ask myself after that I wrote this poem was, how can I reshape myself into something new?
I have also chosen among a collection of creative artistic collage I made about dreams this mixed-media Dadaesque creative art to accompany this poem. I painted the background cobalt blue with golden dots made with an almost dried up nail polisher, with the cutout of a bowl made of clay. The whole thing for me is a metaphor for enlightenment.