Every year I chose a word (theme) or a sentence (motto) that I will be able to apply in my life for one whole year, as to be able to become a better person. For example, I had chosen ‘people only understand from their own level of perception, so stop stressing over what they might think’ as my 2020 motto. ‘Do the things that make you happy; disregard everything that frustrates you’ was my motto for 2019, while ‘happiness’ was my 2018 theme. These little reminders help me to remain positive in my life, and to live with less stress and frustrations; they help me to remember that staying happy is a powerful remedy against despair and the vacuumness of life.

I don’t want to use pills and potions, I only need to silently affirm those words every day as to remember these affirmations each time I face stressful situations, or even when I feel these negative emotions creeping in.

My 2021 motto came easily to me for I kept hearing and seeing the same word over and over again; but it’s only while writing this post that I finalised the whole sentence of it. I guess that this word wants to exist more, and wants its definition to be spread out in the wild. But thing is, I have a very conflictual relationship with this word, for I blame it for everything that went wrong in my life. Till now I haven’t been able to find the right formula, or to make better analysis that might lead me towards making better choices.

Yes, ‘choice’, this main deterministic factor, which, I am sure determines our whole life — because certainly everything is a matter of choice. Every second of our life is shaped by a choice, whether it’s by us, or a choice made by another. We give power to other people by making a choice, or even by deciding not to chose; happiness, sadness, freedom, death, life, health, and everything else, every outcome, the whole future, are shaped by the choices we make in the present time, but also made in the past.

Well… we won’t enter a philosophical debate about my thoughts on free will and determinism, mainly not after I’ve watched the TV series Devs, which challenged my mind on the concept of a deterministic and quantum universe (digging up SF stories here), where now I go with the moment you make a choice the mastermind instantly calculates the pathway; but I cannot decide whether all pathways have already been calculated, or whether new roads align as soon as there is input of choice, for, it is our choices that determine our path… but what about the choice? Why did I chose at first😂? Too complicated, need to leave it to the big thinkers🧐.

Anyways, I have chosen as my 2021 motto, ‘the choice I make determines the outcome; your future depends on your choice’. I’ve started to use this motto, thing that I badly need right now, or ever since I’ve lost my daily writing rhythm, and as well as my daily internet routine, since I have a new occupation on my everyday schedule, and where I haven’t been able to effectively balance my time since then.

I am still off-course and disoriented; I think that I have burnout symptoms. I don’t know how much time it will take for my mind and body to recover from all the forcing I’ve imposed on myself; I don’t even know if I’ll be able to get back to what I used to be doing before. I still don’t know what awaits me.

I just hope that as soon as we enter 2021 I’ll be able to make the right choices that will help me stay organized, find the right balance, make some extra time to be online, and of course to write and exercise my mind everyday. Thus my cure for the coming days, the choice I make: to write, read, watch TV, listen to music, and lots of rest.

Also, since this morning the stoicism philosophical word ‘memento mori’ (Latin for ‘remember that you [have to] die’) has been playing in my head… I guess it’s the answer to my inquiry about what might be the world’s theme… I don’t know, perhaps it’s the actual state of the world that’s been hammering inside of my mind, thus my thoughts about the inevability of death. Now should it be a reminder to me that we are all mere mortals that anyways are going to die, and that remembering that fact could help me make better choices in 2021… I still don’t know… for wouldn’t that be too morbid? Well, I need to think more about that!