Today I thought of flowers blooming Wildly, beautifully, in the fertile soil Their strong roots fiercely stretching Till that secret place, that wild garden
And while musing, I became a flower That had for mother, earth, nature And for father, the sky, the universe I was cherished, loved, cared for Or should I say : I am healthy, I am becoming I am loved, I am cherished
The evil that gnaws me, that eats my body It suddenly disappears, it vanishes It cowers away in the dark, in the shadow
That hungry thing, then, with my peace I gave it away to the wind I gave it away to the sea, to the lake I just, gave it away, letting it fly Where perhaps, and from the bottom of my heart, With hope too, and wishes too That it will find beauty on its own That it will learn the worthiness of love And feel all the emotions that surge When loving, and while being loved And slowly but surely recycle itself Into a soothing thing, incarnating the love That paints tears and heartaches With the vivid divine colors Of all these beautiful blooming flowers.
It’s been two weeks since I haven’t written down anything. I am busy editing my book of poems, and my mind is a little bit tired too. Thus, I had decided that there will be no post today. Instead, I thought of sharing on my social media last year’s poem, titled Mindscape, which I had written for Pink October Breast Cancer Awareness month. But while writing some lines in the carnet meant to appear in the picture setting for this Pink October photo, inspiration struck, and I was able to write this little poem.
I know it’s hard right now. With coronavirus and all the rest… But we need positive waves more than ever before… and I hope that I am doing my part here.
Thank you to whoever might be reading this post. I hope it gets a little bit better for you, for us, for me, for the whole humanity.
Though able-bodied, I feel this incapacity The incapacity to shake myself up Right from the start, when the sun rises For I wake up to forget, everything that I might be
I then search within my mind This wondrous mind of mine Forking deeply, digging, searching For that missing piece hidden deep, That one clue that I need to find
I want to remember when day comes As the sun showers its light upon the world To remember all of my movements Of my first sound and view Of the first waves and its foams Reminiscing about those lost hours And eidolons, first cities, of faces And of the cyclope slowly opening its eye While it sees this world for the first time, Sinking deep to become ours
I know I’ll search endlessly While my body and mind grows On top of mountains, over seas and lands Everyday I’ll learn to construct As to one day rise up and remember Everything that I might be.
I am obsessed about the beginning of existence and knowledge of one-self, fascinated by all of these layers that seem to shrink inside the smallest dot that might be.
All races give out rays of light Under a sun that rises for everyone And stars that shine brightly for everybody.
And what about the plants, the trees? Same too, you see, they appeal to all of us – We’re just different colors, sizes, & shapes Different types of body embodiment.
The ocean rests there, extending itself till horizon For the eye of everyone who surrenders to beauty And for those that mesmerize at the miracle of life.
And then it dawns on everyone, everything As our tears look alike like diamonds That cascade down on those cheeks of us While our Anthurium like heart blooms in same soil.
I would tell you too of the beauty of our variances, Of all these mysteries that make us up And of that blood like magma that streams in us – That unfortunately erupts oftently, with ache and hate.
I don’t hate you brother, I don’t hate you sister –
My whiteness, my blackness, my yellowness, my redness, My coffeeness, my greenness, my contrasts, my uniqueness.
I don’t hate you brother, I don’t hate you sister –
My querness, my disabilities, my loveliness, Our weaknesses, our weaknesses, our weaknesses.
I don’t hate you brother, I don’t hate you sister –
We are only one tiny drop in that ocean of life, Making one member, linked, linked.
And when I finally go to rest, I return to our ocean, mingling as one.
I love you brother, I love you sister.
If you see the uniqueness, if you see beauty, if you see intelligence, if you see the richness, if you see the love, in everybody else, then you’ll be beautiful, you’ll be intelligent, you’ll be rich, you’ll be loved, you’ll be unique. These are the magical words I silently repeat everyday in my head – that one law of attraction that I try to practice, though how difficult it is.
Perhaps I am the leaf, perhaps a bud, or the root, that holds on firmly to a stem. Or perhaps a hand, a finger, a tiny cell, a little bacteria – a function of that one body!
I think that the anthurium plant is an interesting metaphor to describe the human race . . . don’t you think so?
😩I am busy these days – helping my children with their lessons at home, writing, and masterminding new plans. I made a wrong decision at the wrong time, that is, to subscribe to the premium plan when I haven’t even made a cent online, to inject further in my small biz. I don’t want to lose my .com domain – thus my decision to wait until I am sure that I’ll be able to pay for my premium plan. Fact is, if I am unable to pay for my domain name, this web address will revert to its original subdomain address, and there will be too many work that I’ll need to do, that is, changing all the urls on my social media sites and all the rest. So, I do think that it is preferable for me to wait and see.
I try to count –
One, two, three, four, five, six Learning calculation;
Take that one bead I found,
And plus one more around,
There you are, it makes a two.
On my wooden abacus, there I slide the beads,
Red, Blue, Yellow, Green,
There pops out the numbers in colours,
In my twinged mind filled with confusion.
These all that gives whats equal,
Trying to confuse my mind even more,
What I may say about it –
I and the world of digits don’t get along very well,
I prefer the formulations
That emanates from alphabets.
The arithmetician tried to show me the realm of all his calculations,
Ideas that intersect to make a web,
The power of the alphanumeric.
But my mind dreams in images,
Which is much less boring than the mathematician’s integers;
But then, what secrets link those that see
Beyond the forms of things. Spit out,
Beyond the numbers. Chewed out,
Beyond the sentences. Flamed out.
There stood I pale and incensed,
With my mind blowing out nums;
Blowing out nums I don’t logicize.
My mind’s nestle the mistake of logic,
Logic that strays into that dreamer’s eyes,
Eyes that’s black contoured of fatigue
And of the concentration to answer
to nullify or equalize,
I found it was all of a nightmare
My abacus in my bare hands
I try to count, dreamily senseless.
The abacus sits on the corner of a desk
The child needs me to help them count,
My bed is still a mess when days break
And my heart pulls out like daunt
Seriously thinking that it’s no fun
I slide the colourful playful beads
On the wooden abacus that still sits
In a little corner of a white office
Whose circled panes seem to miss
Of the warmth of the throning sun
In the end, with the abacus at hand
I teach un-merry to the curious child
Some calculations that seem to bend
Unrevealed matrices that openly hide
More of coming formulations undone
The abacus sits in the corner of a desk
Alongside some books and other carnets;
Carnets that the child curiously open
Happy now am I, till the coming dusk
To read merrily, holding my pen.
We used to bump each other’s head with bones of Mammoths,
But embraced mechanic, became megalomanic, and created weapons.
We are addicted and addictive creatures,
Easily sprinkled with made up dreams.
We are cells filled of filthyness, of excess of fats, sugar and salt,
With scars that’s hidden deep, deep.
We pretend that we know, but to fend a coconut is knowledge too.
Some of us dream to remain naked, others on the other hand dream of prudery.
We are fragile beings, easily infected, easily affected, easily ruled –
By planets, by pathogens, by tides, by other beings, and more;
Yet we pretend that we are superiority –
The dream of ruling never leaving most of our minds.
Our cutesome babies giggle and cry out loud
And we are able to love, to care, with all of our heart.
We still don’t know who we are, for we are all inflicted with amnesia when morning comes.
Our species is a very clever one, but not yet intelligent, way too material, unaware of what’s energetical,
Thus we burn while we learn, break while we learn.
Look! We’ve been able to materialize that’s what’s only blurry shapes.
We are filled of flaws, of vanity, most of the time disoriented,
We are vermines, vandals, eternal unsatisfied –
We do get easily angry too, forgetting that we are free to be,
Yet, we still beautiful, amazing, and worthy, you know –
Such fascinating living creatures.
We love to dance, to sing, to write poems and forgotten stories of us,
Though unaware of the soul connection,
We are just everything coming from everywhere,
One of the kind, a beautiful find, called the human race.
In such difficult times I always wish that there is something more superior and intelligent that’s above us – guiding, guarding, and watching over everything and everyone that makes up existence. I am not a sceptic nor a believer, I just go along with what I know from my own perceptions… an individualist who suddenly feel shaken by the threat of the Corona virus.
My corporeal, its core, was attracted, and gravitated
Around, man-made planets – all, illusions
But now, that I have dragged, myself out
Am coming back, to you, on a wing of storm
Ready to dive, inside, thecosmic ocean
There where, without any attraction
We’ll only float, carried by the current
Until we touch, and remember, what we have been.
Copyright 2020 Eiravel
Most of the time, when I start to write a poem, I only have ideas for the two or three first lines, and for the rest of the poem, I often need to get the needed inspiration from nature, reading, or music, and where, strangely, the poem I write, takes the form of something that really connects to me – as if, I had solved a problem concerning my situation.
Of course, it’s art for the sake of art, but more than often, I don’t know why, but I unconsciously unleash things of a profundity that I wasn’t aware before.
The soul, to me, is the intellect. Before, I didn’t need it, for I didn’t need to think that much, my whole life had only been flesh and corporeal. But now that I need it more than ever… Loll – because now that I need to think a lot, because writing is an intellectual thing, isn’t it? I need to find my intellect again – thus, this poetic metaphor, an ode to my own mind.
Two little poems, one for drug abuse, and one, for victims of torture
As today is the United Nations International Day Against Drug Abuse And Illicit Trafficking, as well as United Nations International Day In Support Of Victims Of Torture, I decided to write these two little poems. I always fear to write about these serious issues, for perhaps, I might have accidentally written things that might touch sensitive souls, or even attract the anger of some. For these two poems, I tried a new way of juxtaposing.
#Health4JusticeJustice4health (This year theme)
Devastating, tearing, possessing
That body that mind that life
The illusion of
Feeling, ascending, escaping
Something somewhere everywhere
Stop you from
Sensing, appreciating, envisioning
That existence of yours
Are invisible chains
Imprisoning, hurting, digressing
The one you are and ought to be
And what if you, beautiful human being, you were tempted to take that scourge of destruction so as to never realise…
Just Think… Just Think You, always had the answer…
To the magnificence of your core Where the tempter has always been around
For your downfall…
From Horror To Healing (UN’s Theme)
Torture of the mind
Invisible dagger that stings
Lost amongst all these laughter
A part of the inside that dies miserably
But that part that stays
That part that has always been
Before the experience of horror
It helps at will to heal
I really don’t know more what to say
Than that Of being gentle with yourself…
I am tired for so long, with nobody to alleviate my pain, and the burdens of all my mistakes. I stay into a mental gauge, unfree to decide on my ownof what is to be made of me. I see enemies and wrecked soulall along the way, where they stayinto a darkness, filled of morbid thoughts. I hate you for imprisoning me, and taking the steer of my own ship. I hate you for what you are, and I hate myself more – to not be able to extend my wrath over you. I am tired of all this shit and brokenness, and I want to go sleep into my own bed – A bed made by me, under its wondrous eye. I am tired of all of you and of your wickedness. This game, doesn’t please me anymore . . . You, getting everything, and me, nothing . . . You, the parasite that feeds on me . . . You, that hide me from all good eyes . . . You, that keep taking everything from me. You think I don’t see you! You think I don’t hear you, and you seem to forget what I am. Hence, I am tired, for you’ve taken too much. And now my bones, they are all dried up.
Oh. Wait. What I see there. Isn’t it the gigantic woad-tattooed beast. All bare naked. The companion of vivacity. It is always breaking in. Not to take. But to give. Only to me. As it always says. Vivacity. Strength. Self-love. Self-confidence. It feeds me. Of hatred for all. Of disastrous stories. Of the ones it devours. For it to grow. To love only me. To love only its shadows. Of life. Of aliveness.
I was tired for so long, then it came my way. Breaking barriers and oceans. Stirring my emotions relentlessly. A booster, to feed my appetiteof raw meats and blood slicking out. While it goes out hunting, I sleep and make good dreams; I rest onto our hidden Eden. Then, between dawn and dust I am fed with the strength of wicked things. Where it sings horrific lullabies to my ears of the humongous deeds it inflicts to the wicked. It whispers into my ears to keep these as livestock for us to feed on. For its appetite is bold and time is long living all alone. I used to be always tired for such a long time. I was too soft and too cool; Too good and too forgiving. So I made a business deal, of course, with the beautiful beast. For it to feast on those emotions that tie me up, and of all things that feed on my deeds.
And how do I pay back, shall you sayWell, I lay into its strong arms – Its love for me is ferocious, you know It can bleed you to deathIf ever you make me cry, Thus, I listen silently to all the news of horrorsAnd it rocks me till I sleep, with its whispers of death. I used to be always so tiredFor too long, way too longNow, I have a shoulder to lean onOne, that take care of me, without taking.
Lately, I’ve been very tired, and I do think that I am really fed up of all of this. So, this is a metaphor for the subject of being tired itself. I find tiredness as being a parasitic thing that sucks all of my energies; feeding on me and gaining all the strength needed to continue growing. And like all these horror movies that I like watching, I see it, as being the enemy that alleviates all my hope and dreams, and somewhere within this negative aspect of living life extensively, something else sprouts out of this body and mind condition. Thus the second part of this free-verse poem, is a metaphoric allusion to the contrary of tiredness, which is vivacity, powerful energies, and raw blood (it’s just that I’ve got some Iron Manganese Copper (😂😂it’s so beurky-beurky-beurk, I don’t understand the vampires… dude, blood is not tasty attt alllll) when I went to the doctor during my recent anaemic condition, and as the good fictionnair that I am, I had to invent some untypical kind of imagery).
I imagined some kind of powerful mythical creature, exactly, one that has a tribal tattoo on the middle of its forehead, that goes into a battle against tiredness, feed me of the energies of the enemies, and giving me back my vivacity, which brings balance to my energy and helps at my rehabilitation.
So, as you all can see, with high doses of nonsense, pints of metaphors, mythology, and all the rest, this poem took shape.
I am currently reading catch-22, by Joseph Heller. And I found myself being immersed into a strange world filled of absurdisme, with pints of surrealism; genres that I have at heart. And I do think that while writing this piece, my mind was still planning into the dimensional space of this book.
“Sometimes, when I can’t seem to come up with something deem as being the norm for writing a piece, I abandon myself to whatever my mind commands during the process of drafting something; where most of the time, the sentences seem to be bits of some kind of analysis I have unconsciously stored into my random access memory. In the end, it becomes a piece rooted into absurdisme, conquest, and surrealism. It becomes pure invention of a genre that begs to become concrete. And whether this writing experiment works or not as to fit the certainty of pleasuring the mind of readers, I personally think, that it offers the evading experience needed to achieve the finality of what reading fiction has to offer.”
Why you love reading fiction? Because of time.
Time! What’s time?
A fiction! Say . . .The process.
What’s the process then?
The writer thinks. The writer writes. The writer crafts. Time. Then, the reader reads, and, it’s a story with a start and finish, compressed into one whole book. Time.
No. There’s more. There’s more. Tell. A book. A creation. A subtle aesthetic design.
Then there it is. And what if What if we can’t seem to feel That these filmsical skies seal A spell with which we can’t deal Hidden under glows of sun And glows of moonlit beam Of this one thing that wants to be seen But still remain lock away behind screen And where one can only feel its eye upon us When attuned with it with all of our senses With all of our mental capabilities What would have you done If ever you were all alone Into a cold and darkening void Accessing remotely to everything What would you have done? That is the question To you.
I close my eyes and the night veil behind my eyes seems cold and lone, so I shut them a little bit more, letting my eyelids stretch out their skin. And right there, behind this curtainless path, phosphenes starts to dance, dotting the night, drawing the forms.
Clause Cott pushed the man beside her, from the lengthy ladder that stretched itself to his domain, he fell into eternal abyss, bound to start again — was it an abduction, or was it the insanely love thoughts of a mind in love?
Something behind seems to push my mind towards a screen inwards, where whom is observing seems like an alien wavelength of 10-millions-and-billions of endless light-years. Phosphenes and dark are the designs of immaterial images, formed from the essence of my own experience.
Clause Cott took her by the hand and showed her his realm, a realm filled of intermingled thin cables, and lengthy-like-file-cabinets filled of flashing small lights.
Something spurs right into my mind, an abstract idea filled of the imagination of what seems to be to me, and of the stories that writes itself on a night canvas filled of excited phophenes — joyful of running away from a galaxy cluster, to become shooting stars into a mind that blossoms from nebula-dews.
“I knew you would come, so I made this bigger sleeping cove,” Clause Cott gently said, as he laid her by his side, kissing her naked shoulders.
Evasion, always evasion that partakes my mind, too imprisoned into these clusters of unfilled brains and nightmarish dreams of conquer and freedom. My imagination flies onto wishing-wells, to mingle into pen-ink and digital-codes, morphing into writings, that fills my heart with happiness and beauties.
“Come, I’ll show you something.” Clause Cott took her hands and led her to another chamber, throned with a gigantic plasma globe, shooting lights into every-way, inside of a glass prison, that rages to set itself free.
The first alphabet sets the playground for my imagination, where the stories become concrete, where my words become the witness of my existence, where everything for once seems to be under my control.
“You’ll see what happens when I plug to this globe.” Suddenly Clause Cott went under seizure, as his blue eyes completelyturned static.
“Imagination is the only weapon against the war of reality”, and as in Alice in wonderland, my mind keeps pathing its way deeper, far away from this cold void, more and more into the warming light, coming to me, shading those black mirrors that fakes eternal spins.
Suddenly, out of her pocket, a mini laser beam, that she shot till the plasma globe. Lightnings were set free, where they streaked into every ways, stretching further and farther. Clause Cott disconnected, his eyes becoming normal again. He looked at her, and she was smiling, and to him, she looked more beautiful than she ever did.
I unwrap from self to become myself, far away from those judging eyes and hearts, into a sphere made of self-love there can’t be hate for the others, so I back-end my way and continue towards further and farther into my stretched imagination.
“I had to do it… I had to, they were too sad into this prison,” she said happily. Suddenly all of the thunder-lights wrapped both of them, flying them up into the darkness.
“See, I command them, and nothing that you might do or say, cannot appear ugly to me… I know, for every inch of you is beautiful to me,” Clause Cott said, as he made the lights dance with his magic-wand finger.
At night I often dream that I am phosphenes dancing into other worlds, morphing nightmares into papers, weaving forms and shapes into stories, into which I escape, only for some minutes, only for some hours.
-To all those who dare to dream, continue dreaming, perhaps I might find you, in between those times that suspend –
Immaculate canvas —
Awaited for brushstrokes
Like a lover waiting for love
Like a pen in need of use
Like a mould wanting to shape,
Expressions and Abstractions
Materialising from minds
To come alive into existence
To exist, to make you see —
Invisible information, invisible lessons
– Invisible instructions
Focusing elements of life
Begging to be seen through detailed intellect
Deciphering the beauty that’s ours
Detailing the truth that’s ours
His hand draws contours
And bits of remembrance
Comes back each time
The mind creates from genuine self
To scream out to us —
That we remembered.
Artworks of every type have always been of great inspiration for me
Today I was inspired to write this poem when an artwork by Paul Klee appeared on Google Doodles. The painting was so striking to me that it kindled my imagination. Have to say that artworks created genuinely always catches my attention, which brings out-forth my fascination for the creator of the work.
Am letting all go —
Of the weight that is sinking me
Into a puddle of muddy water
Am letting all go —
Of all my troublesome follies
Am letting go —
Of all the troubles that tear my heart away
Life will be my panacea
Love will be all that I will breath
I will survive and rise,
Whereupon all my burden of sadness & miseries
Should disperse into the atmosphere.
I love you all... but I love myself many more.
This piece is from an old poetry notebook. I think that formerly posted it on other websites through my old account… but nevermind, here it is again:
Deep down in the forest I looked for you
Deep Down In The Forest
I heard you calling my name...
Deep down in the forest I found you
Deep down in the forest you were in agony
Deep down in the forest I took you in my arms,
And there deep in the woods shall my lover always rest.
I am not a simple person —
I rest my mind into other dimensions
Housed by some kind of alienated specimen
That talks to me as I sleep,
And that disperse as soon as the light shows its face;
I swim into some seas
That look like seaweeds and algae,
Of some sort of sandy past
That sticks into hairs and skin.
I play around on my paddling wheelbarrow boat,
Spun like a thread in the hands of the Moira
And my soldier of fate installs bitter thoughts
Into my heart, as if a reminder
Of my cruel designation as a mortal
Which imprisons gazillions of old atoms.
They travel into their own space universe
Aware of the tricks they play
Of the trouble they cause for a cause
And of the fear they instill into hearts and soul
As they childishly play with that skin I despise.
And as soon as when the light comes shining
On that part of my earth
I say to them goodbye
And we become mortals again... until then...
Into this cave as deep as the ocean
I found a heart as large as space;
Corner stoned by glitters,
Mingled to the colors of the gaseous nebula
Waves of love from galactic particles
Sublimates my mind & seduces me to be
Atomic beings birthed from the origin day
Beseech me to transmogrify the skin I live in
We dance in my mind & talk of worlds
That could be ours — of worlds to create
And I defy your mortal laws —
I swim into forbidden seas
& elevate my mind higher to them
Can you see my atoms that plays around?
Can you see us, can you see yourself
Now, wake and create — we were waiting for you.